Why I Love Holi

The festival of colors, that is what they call it right? Sure it is. You see colors everywhere around you, people throwing water balloons, dry colours, gulal, and having sweets, bhaang and a lot of fun, dance and music. Though most of this is what is potrayed in Bollywood movies, the water, colors, and sweets can be seen in any Indian home. With so much fun and frolic around, how can anyone possibly not love Holi?

Bullshit.

I'll tell you the way it happens.

I remember the time when I was 8 or 9 years old, and I was very enthusiastic about Holi. It used to be a lot of a fun with my little friend circle, us small little kiddies splashing around water. But that wasn't until the big bully's came in. They were the dreaded guys, you'd want to die rather than meet these people, especially when you're having a lot of fun. Like to know what Holi means to them?

* Using grease, lubricant oils, eggs, and the worst - distemper paint instead of using any kind of normal dry/wet colors.

* We used to have a small pit dug in the ground, about 2 feet deep. That was filled with water that became muddy, and kids were stripped and slammed into this water hole, sometimes leading to bleeding or broken bones.

* Balloons, filled with the dirtiest water you can imagine.


After torturing us like brutal barbarians, they actually had fun, and laughed a lot. And they planned on repeating it again next year.

Some other younger kids, they would slap a pichkari (water gun) or a water balloon in your face, and then smirkingly say, "Bura na mano holi hai! (Don't get mad, it's Holi!)" . I wish I could punch them so hard in their jaws that atleast 5 of their teeth would get embedded in my knuckles, and leaving their face in a bleeding puddle of shit, I would say, "Bura na mano {pause for dramatic effect}; Holi hai."

So by now you're thinking, "This guy has been tortured in the past and is an introvert, anti-socialist, Holi hater. I don't need to read more." If I hate the festival so much, then why the hypocritical title?

You're wrong again. I love the festival. Reason? Free food! Our society organises a free lunch for all the residents, which is mostly crap, but has one or two things that are worth having. The only thing I care about is that it's free. I love anything that I can get for free. It absolutely makes my day like nothing else can. So now, I keep on waiting for Holi the whole year round, to grab on to the complimentary lunch.

Why Hash Is Dying

I still hate the world. I still think that women are responsible for their own condition, and I still believe that bully's should be shot in the head.

Recent developments in the online world have discouraged me a lot, with bloggers being put in jail, websites being banned, kids being rusticated from schools/colleges/universities for writing online about their teachers or their places of study, and the biggest of all - censorship of content on the internet. All of this has forced me to reconsider if I should or should not rant about what I feel. Whatever happened to the freedom of speech?

Another thing that is bugging me is my name. I use my real name online. Most of the world around tells me that I should be anonymous, for my own safety. Even employers Google your name before recruiting you. Your online identity overpowers your real life personality, and people start seeing you as a blogger rather than just another human being.

With all the policing going on, there is hardly anything left that I am 'allowed' to blog about. Most of it comes under what is called 'morally grey territory'. The things that don't, they haven't yet inspired me enough that I spend my time blogging about them. When I have something to write, I really feel about it strongly, I will blog about it. But sadly I'll have to edit and re-edit it until it is safe for me to post it and it will not affect me in any which way in my future.